Last month a comedy tour stopped in the City of Roses that offered a handful of everyone's favorite 1990's Saturday Night Live players. Shout out to the nineties- woop woop! Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, David Spade and Norm MacDonald were on the bill, and while this is a dream team line up of guys I have long loved (sadly missing my favorite- Chris Farley), the $100 or more price tag per ticket was more than this working girl could afford. So I turned on a vintage SNL and imagined what they would be telling jokes about in Portland: Hipsters, beards and one can only assume marijuana.
And then I never thought about this night again.
That is until one week later when I ran into a guy I kinda sorta know. He is a server at the iconic Virginia Cafe downtown, and starting telling me a story about some famous patrons that he had recently served. His story went something like this:
"It was about midnight and I was outside having a cigarette when a group of people walked past me, as they entered the door I greeted them with an "I'll be right there" as I grumbled to myself about having another group to serve. I walked in, went over to the table and crouched down asking them what I could do for them when to my surprise a man with a very distinct voice asked "Uh, do you guys have sunny side up eggs?", I slowly lifted my head to see the face that matched that voice- it was Adam Sandler! And no, he wasn't joking, he really ordered sunny side up eggs at midnight. I knew eggs were not on our late night menu, but who was I kidding, Adam Sandler wants eggs, I am going to get him eggs. I asked him if he would like a drink and he told me that he doesn't drink so I offered to bring him an ice water. He was so nice and genuine, and he was wearing normal dude clothes, cords and a superman t-shirt.
To his right was Norm MacDonald. He ordered a wedge salad but wanted it to be cut up for him. Celebrities cannot be bothered to cut up their own food! Norms on air persona of being a grump matched his in person persona.
The humor of a Colonial Sanders choosing a salad over a bucket of greasy chicken is not lost on me here. That cracked me up!
Coming in late to join the group was Rob Schneider. Rob was also very nice, and was the only one dressed to impress. He was wearing a button up shirt and a sport coat. But here's the thing- he ordered the weirdest stuff! He ordered a basket of fries, an order of potato skins and a glass of Merlot! Merlot with potato skins- disgusting! "
This is where I let the laughing out loud commence. I thought the sunny side eggs at midnight were the weirdest, but this guy was so put off by that glass of merlot. Hashtag server problems.
Anyway, that is all of this little celebrity sighting. There weren't any fights, or secrets to be exploited, if that's wat you are looking for try TMZ. These celebs ate, paid their bills and tipped like normal decent folks. I guess celebrities are just like us after all!